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Wow, two weeks away from my column and I come back to this one. Threads collapsed expanded unthreaded. Then, the resulting messages in his head can completely get in the way of his feeling joy and passion in gay sex. He's very confused, perhaps feeling cornered by family or friend pressures. I am a year

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Do you have the courage to tell this guy you want to start out differently?

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Ask Brian: My boyfriend got drunk and arrested and then told me he has sex with men

Tell him the truth. My husband's job has sucked all the life out of him Hold the front page. A typical man worries about his penis size and whether or not a partner will accept it. He's very confused, perhaps feeling cornered by family or friend pressures.

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We don't 'make it up'. Are you concerned about the size of your penis? But he's also clearly someone who is struggling and needs help as well, so I don't want to overly bash him for his behaviour. By way of illustration, a something party animal living in London who uses Twitter, frequents the Vauxhall scene and is comfortable using recreational drugs is both more likely to hear about and more likely to answer the survey than a middle-aged gay man living in the countryside with a dodgy internet connection. I've been hugging and clinching and gazing with affection. Should I still be with him? It's all the lost possessions

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